At least at this point in my life… I don’t remember making the choices.
Growing up in the county we were very active, always outside playing, riding the horse (till she bucked me off), sliding down hills on cardboard, and riding our bikes
When I was about 10 they built a grocery store out in our area, about a miles walk from my home. This is my earliest time of really thinking I had a problem with weight and food. I always wanted to walk to the store and buy the 3 candy bars for $.99 or the specials of 4 for$1. I wanted candy and sweets all the time and thought of myself as fat.
My Senior year in High School was the year I was the slenderest. I had gone my whole life being disgusted with my weight and wishing I was skinny like my friends…and even at this time in my life.. I still had it in my head that I had no control that I was a sugar addict and I was still fat.
Now today, I use this picture as what I want to look like. I can look at this picture and feel how good it felt to be healthy and slender.. I realize now that skinny was not the right term, I want to healthy and that means slender.
Journey forward through the years of marriage, kids, divorce, marriage, Son in Iraq, and I ballooned to an all time high, using food for being, Happy, Mad, Sad, Glad.. everything but being hungry, cause when you eat out of all your emotions.. how can you ever be hungry.
When I was given this picture from a friend in January that year I was beyond disgusted with myself. How could I have so little control in this area of my life. Life was amazing.. other than my health. I started at the gym working out 5 or 6 days a week, changed how I ate and at 45 yrs old and 4 months later, I had only lost 9 lbs. A few friends were doing a program I had not heard of before that used meal replacements and had a focus on changing your habits so when you lost the weight you would know how many calories you burned and how many calories you could eat. I thought I had tried them all from A – Z Atkins to the Zone… this was different. and I lost 40 lbs in a matter of months
Here is what that looked like, I felt great but I was still not at the proper weight for my height. Through this program I became a Health Coach helping many many people regain their health and learn the Habits of Health to keep the weight off….. But life happens and I was not strong enough in my own new Habits to keep the weight under control anymore. I had maintained it for three years with a desire to lose 12 – 15 more lbs… in these last three years as life happened, my finances went in the garbage, my step mother and my father passed away and I got stuck in a cycle of eating for all the wrong reasons again. I know the program works to lose the weight and works fairly fast and is very healthy for you…. but I needed help for my head… I need to change the way I think and react to life.
So here I am in the center of the picture.. again.. fat… back to almost as heavy as I had ever been. Feeling out of control, disgusted and angry.
My Friend and business partner, Dr Wayne Scott Andersen had been in the process of writing a new book and allowed me to read it before it was published. That became my game changer. I need to work on my head in order to lose the weight and keep it off once and for all. I created my Healthier life board…. the picture below are some of the compelling reasons I want to be slender and healthy. I want to be able to keep up with my grand babies, play tennis with out worrying about my knees or having enough energy, I want explore the world and not feel tired and out of breath….. Finding my WHY and holding onto that is just a small part of what I took from the book.
So this blog is dedicated to all of us that have struggled with the roller coaster weight, I am using what I have learned from his book “discover your Optimal Health” and a few others to help others while helping myself gain that Happy Healthy Life we were meant to have. Too change out thinking to a healthier way of life. I hope you will follow a long and comment often so we can inspire each other… We are better together.